Bytes: MORE HER MAJ ANECDOTES

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On the occasion of her 72nd anniversary to her husband, Prince Philip, the Queen of England loudly commented during a public appearance: “What’s the date?”

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According to the book The Wicked Wit of Queen Elizabeth II, after Queen Elizabeth’s cousin-in-law Princess Michael of Kent made a comment on television on how she’d like to shoot the queen’s corgis, the monarch retorted: “They’re better behaved than she is.”

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At the 2016 Chelsea Flower Show, a gardener told her how lilies of the valley have poisonous traits. The queen replied, darkly, “I’ve been given two bunches this week. Perhaps they want me dead.”

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In 2007, Queen Elizabeth made an official visit to the White House. During the welcome ceremony, President George W. Bush mistakenly said the queen helped Americans celebrate their bicentennial in 1776, not 1996. He quickly corrected the error, but the queen wouldn’t let him live it down: At a formal dinner two days later, she began her speech by saying, “I wondered whether I should start this toast by saying, ‘When I was here in 1776...’ ”

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When visiting New Zealand in 1986, the queen and Prince Philip were pelted with eggs thrown by protestors. Later, at a state banquet, she remarked: “New Zealand has long been renowned for its dairy produce, though I should say that I myself prefer my New Zealand eggs for breakfast.”

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In the summer of 2013, royal baby watch hit a fervor as the world waited for Prince George. When pressed for clues at an engagement, the queen simply replied:…“I hope it arrives soon because I’m going on holiday.”

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In the ’60s, she watched the Everly Brothers singing “Cathy’s Clown” at the annual royal variety performance. To say she was unimpressed was an understatement: She muttered to her lady-in-waiting that they sounded like “two cats being strangled.”

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Once, while driving up to the Royal Windsor Horse Show, she was unrecognised by a guard. “Sorry, love, you can’t come in without a sticker,” he told her. The Queen, unfazed, replied: “I think if you check, I will be allowed to come in!”

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During an interview for the documentary The Coronation, the queen joked to BBC’s Alastair Bruce about the difficulties of wearing a crown: “You can’t look down to read the speech,” she said of donning the diadem during official ceremonies. “If you did, your neck would break.”

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In an argument with the Queen Mother, the elder royal said to her daughter—“Who do you think you are?” To which Queen Elizabeth replied: “The Queen, mummy, the Queen.”

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Artist Juliet Pannett, when she was painting a portrait of Queen Elizabeth, was told by the monarch about a funny run-in she had while out buying groceries. Whilst at Sandrigham "they were having tea when they ran out of cake. So, the Queen said she had gone down to the local shop to buy some, wearing a head scarf. As she came out of the shop, an elderly lady said, 'Good heavens, you look just like the queen.' She replied 'How reassuring' and just kept walking. It was a wonderful tale."

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In 2005, she met musician Eric Clapton at a reception at Buckingham Palace that was being held to celebrate the country's music industry. When Clapton introduced himself to the queen, she asked, "Have you been playing a long time?" Fortunately, Clapton didn't take offense at the Queen's not knowing who he was. “It must be 45 years now,” he calmly replied.

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At her coronation, Queen Elizabeth had to wear a set of heavy robes. Before the ceremony began, she turned to the Archbishop of Canterbury, asking him to give her a little nudge to "get me started." The carpet at Westminster Abbey had been installed with its pile going the wrong way. As a result, the queen couldn't easily move because the fringe of her robes kept getting caught in the carpet's pile, clawing at her back when she tried to walk.

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The Queen wears neon outfits so that people who have waited hours to see her will be able to catch a glimpse of her brightly coloured clothes. To further ensure that people can see her, the queen isn't afraid to tell someone off. One commander learned that the hard way when he stood in front of her during a state visit, blocking the crowd's view of the royal carriage. "Actually, Captain, I think it's me they've come to see," the queen joked.

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When Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau toasted to Queen Elizabeth's 60-year reign, she responded, "Thank you, Mr. Prime Minister of Canada, for making me feel so old."

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When London hosted the 2012 Olympics, the Queen participated in a skit with "James Bond" actor Daniel Craig in which she appeared to jump out of a helicopter.

The helicopter jump was actually performed by stuntman Gary Connery, but Queen Elizabeth "was very amused by the idea and agreed immediately," royal dressmaker Angela Kelly wrote in her memoir, "The Other Side of the Coin: The Queen, the Dresser and the Wardrobe."

"I asked then if she would like a speaking part," Kelly wrote. "Without hesitation, Her Majesty replied: 'Of course I must say something. After all, he is coming to rescue me.'"

In an appearance on the BBC's "The Zoe Ball Breakfast Show," Craig said that the Queen showed off her improvisation skills during their scenes together.

"She literally kind of said, 'Would you like me to pretend to be writing?' And he's like, 'Yes, that's great, that's great.' So she sort of acted a bit. That was all her own stuff. It was amazing."

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In 2012 John and Frances Canning had booked Manchester Town Hall for their civil wedding. Learning that the Queen was going to be at the Town Hall that day, they sent her a lighthearted invitation to join them. The Palace sent back a polite thank you.

Without the prior knowledge by the bride and groom, the Queen made a surprise visit to their wedding.

According to Frances: “When we had our ceremony, the staff asked us to wait for a moment in the corridor and just a few minutes later the Queen arrived. She knew both our names and apparently we had been especially added to her rota.”

Groom John, 48, said: “I’m a big fan of the Royal family. When we found out who the VIP was we wrote to her, a bit light-heartedly, and got a nice letter back from a lady in waiting. We didn’t expect anything further to come from it.”

The couple’s 40 guests stared in amazement as the Queen, Prince Philip, and dignitaries lined up to congratulate the newlyweds.

He said: “The Queen asked how we were feeling, and congratulated us. Prince Philip was asking where in Italy we were going for our honeymoon. They had clearly been briefed about what we were doing.”

Despite their shock, the groom had the presence of mind to bow, and the bride to curtsey.